Autism & Writing: How Poetry Helps Me Communicate
By Lisa Smith
Autism and Writing
My name is Lisa Smith, and I am autistic. I had limited communication as a child but because I was eager to communicate, I started to write. At first, I never knew that I could write much less write a poem. I was diagnosed with a severe learning disability in my late teens which made sense why reading and writing and yes even learning was impossible as a child. But one day I wrote how I felt. A friend of mine who was an adult when I was a child loved it. I then would write to her to share my thoughts. The thing was: if I wrote a letter in those days no one would understand what I wrote, but writing it in poetry form people would light up — and to me I must have done something good.
Because of this I wrote about everything I see, feel, hear, or experience. I found my way to communicate to the outside world. For me this world was always scary, and I realize very young if I was going to survive, I need to find a way to communicate.
Finding My Voice Through Poetry
Writing poems opened up so much for me. It is like sitting at a piano and composing a masterpiece. And when I am finished all the music around me plays as I read my poem. And when someone reads it in their brain, they too hear the music and react. I am not a born talker, even though I can out talk almost anyone, but in writing I found my voice.
In writing a poem. I can advocate for myself, I can defend myself, I can socialize, I can do any and everything that a talker can do. Growing up my brain was alive and I answered everyone by using my brain, but no one answered back. Sadly, I was always isolated because of this. But when I sit down to compose a masterpiece and everyone reads it, I then find my place in the world. I am bold when I write my poems and letters. If I am not allowed to write then I don’t have a voice — and I have a lot to say, yes, I do. I can paint a masterpiece and compose the best song just by writing a poem.
My Gift
Yes, I hear music when I write and I can write the high pitch and the lows. I can make it scary or make it silly. I dance to the music I hears with my pen. And it stopped when I write the last word. People wonder how do I write such beautiful words but how can you ask a musician how he/she composes such beautiful sound?
My name is Lisa Smith and I am a poet not by choice but it is a gift indeed.
Here are two of Lisa’s poems:
Sadness
By Lisa Smith
I always try to do the right things
Always. But the right thing
Always turns out to be the
Wrong thing,
No matter how hard I try
I can’t get it right you see.
Because the right thing
Ended up to be the wrong thing.
This life is weird and hard
To figure out because if
You try and try and still try
But ended up doing the
Wrong thing than things
Are upside down you see
But I keep trying again and
Tomorrow I try again, and
Even if yesterday I never
Get it right then today I
Surely try some more.
But I am concerned and that is
If I try to do the right thing and
It turns out to be wrong thing
Why is that? And what should
One do? Because trying to do
The right thing and it turn out
To be wrong thing, it is all so draining.
Do you
By Lisa Smith
Do you ever feel lost?
And you think that
You can’t because
You feel lost and
Want to be home
Do you ever wonder
Why you were born
This way?
Life is not easy
Especially with what
Going on inside you.
Do you ever think
Maybe you were
Meant to endure
What you have
Been bearing?
Stop and acknowledge
The gift that you have
Because of what you
Are living with.
What if you weren’t you?
Who would do what
You do?
Who would impact
Others like you do?
Who would make
Someone laugh
Like you do?
Or who can give
The kind of hugs
You give that makes
Others feel wanted.
Yes you
Me.
He.
She.
We are born with
Different brains
But the world would
Not be same if
You weren’t you.
My name is Lisa Smith. I have autism and other diagnoses too. I love to laugh and make others laugh too. Life can be hard and my thinking is. If I can impact you and make a difference, I will and chin up, it will be okay. I am an introvert and have a serious yet funny outlook BUT I love people and to make a difference in someone’s life is what my heart desires. I have this motto and it is where there is a will there’s a way if you dare to dream try. I love to write and write before I can speak. I think I had language before language found me. I love words and life but I love God the most and I also have a different way of looking at things but to me if everyone was the same, it would be a boring world to be. I am me and the me you see is the me that I am.
